As I study the research on happiness (for my training workshops), one idea dominates: happiness is a state of mind. This probably sounds overly obvious (in the abstract) but applying this to my daily life is a struggle.
We all have dreams and goals. These are vital to life. But if dreams slip into "when _____ happens, I'll be happy," it's time to question these thoughts.
Lately I've become obsessed (again) with living on Lake Michigan. I long to move north-some quiet beaches in Wisconsin are the most peaceful and spiritual places I know. Since I believe in the power of intention, and prayer, and hard work, I approach this desire with energy and optimism. But even with my best creative thinking, I can't find a way to make this dream happen soon.
Today I've felt a shriller inner voice pleading, "Come on God, I really want this! I'll pray so hard you'll have to make this happen!" (Here I'm like my puppy who begs and begs until I give her what she wants).
But then I remember happiness research. If I got the home on Lake Michigan, would it really make me happier? I find a deep inner peacefulness at the lake but isn't there a way to create that peacefulness anywhere? Happiness research says yes. Our thoughts, not our circumstances create happiness. Certain daily disciplines, (like meditating and practicing gratitude can even change the brain toward a happier state).
Can I really create the same peaceful feelings in my urban backyard as those that envelop me when I sit on an empty beach, listening to the waves? I will try. And even now, as I shift from the desperate need for something in the future to the quiet acceptance of the Now, I know greater peace.
I'm a passionate person with many goals and desires. It is a challenge to balance my enthusiasms and ambitions with an acceptance of Life's limits. Today I make a new goal--to keep practicing both gratitude and acceptance of the limits of today. © 2009 Laura Lewis-Barr all rights reserved
No more to read on this post. Even though Blogger says
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Can You Be Happy Anywhere?
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I recovered from methamphetamine addiction on Lake Michigan shores and by running three times a day around the dunes of Pentwater. Living on the beach, especially in winter, opened up possibilities, certainly things to write about, I had never seen before. I do not know if there are sacred places. No sacred place is so sacred that industry/man/humankind/commercialism/the-great-machine wouldn't hesitate to turn it -- and the earth itself -- into a shit hole. Lake Michigan itself seems an endangered species. PCBs, the consistent drop in water levels, erosion, development, industrial pollution; the list is endless. I would argue that we need to move to the lake to work our magic for it rather than moving to the lake for it to work its magic for us. Happiness is an illusion. Reality is a toilet we have made out of what we call desire. It, too, begs and begs to get what it wants. How many people can even afford this dream. What the lake needs are many, many shriller voices that will sing and fight for it. -- Tim Barrus
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